Monday, September 22, 2014

Meet Me At The Adjective Noun

I always liked me a tavern with a nice two-word name. "The Prancing Pony". "The Kneeling Man". "The Vulgar Unicorn". Okay yeah them's is techicallies three words, but the "the" don't count. Me blog, Me rules. Shorter names, like "Cheers", and longer ones, like "Saint Bob's 58th Street Bar and Grill and Wenches", just never really did it fer me. Dunno why.

Anywho, I's plannin' fer ta have an inn in me garrison. Or mebbe a tavern. Ain't really sure which the difference is. Anywho, a place where adventurers can come in from the rain, sit by a roarin' fire, flirt with the servin' persons, share a bed with Ishmael an' Queequeg, meet they's fellow adventurers an' exchange banters like "My name? My name??!? Tell me my name, or I shall kill you!" (Ya had ta be there fer that one. Trust me, it were funnies.)

But me tavern gonna need a name. I ain't thinkin' what Blizz'll give it a good one for me, so I done went ta the Red Dragon Inn (see, two words) and used they's random name generator fer ta come up with a few. You buggers like any of these?

The Angry Eunuch
The Elven Harlot
The Thirsty Lute
The Hairy Giant
The Dented Shield
The Flirting Friar
The Yawning Wyrm
The Drunk Duck
The Wanton Kobold
The Ribald Paladin

Alternativelies, the random generator in me brain decided fer ta spit these ones out:

The Awkward Gigolo
The Angry Bird
The Discontinuous Icosahedron
The Painted Druid
The Iron Beard
The Snoring Elephant
The Brass Knuckles
The Spinning Princess

Decisions, decisions .... is good thing I got another couple months fer ta figger this one out.

Thursday, September 18, 2014

Beta Is Beta

Had me a post all sets ta go about craftin' and garrisons and work orders and minions followers. But, in additions ta fixin' a metric crapton of stuffs what were broken, last night's build done changed all the numbers. How long, how many, how much, all be different today. So I gonna waits fer the dust ta settle, then try again.

What I can say is, garrison buildings done speed up yer transmutinifications. Assignin' a follower ta the buildin' helps. More than that, I's still figgerin' out. Again.

Wednesday, September 17, 2014

I Be Diggin'

Now, I's just a simple orc. I hit things with me axe, I loves exotic wimmenz, and every now an' then I dabbles a bit in stuff what be interestin'. But right now me dabblin' be closin' in on somethin' kinda nifty.

Only needs fer ta find me two more pristine artifacts, an' Lorewalker Cho sez he's gonna start callin' me "Ratshag, Seeker of Knowledge." Now wouldn't that be somethin'? Mom'd be damn proud. Prolly dad too, though closest he'd come to admittin' it would be ta hit me upsaid the head and say "Go git me another beer, boy!"

Tuesday, September 16, 2014

A True Priest Stitches Her Own Long Johns

Professions in WoD: Part 1 of Several

I were gonna call this "A True Warrior Forges His Own Axe", but I done used that sayin' a few times over the years so I figgers it be time fer a change. Besides, this one done cover the topic just as well.

So latelies I been sneakin' me some peeks inta the beta, 'cause, well, I's a curious bugger an' the done left the door unlocked. In particulars I were interested in professions, 'cause them buggers done change every expansion. And I was not disappoint. Now, some of you buggers may be wantin' fer to go in blind, so outta respects I gonna pause here an' throw up some pictures of priests an' long johns. Gonna be spoilers below. Ya been warned.

And we's back.

So. Professions. Great googly moogly, Blizz done changed'em.

Fer starters, they all be followin' the same model now fer craftin' stuff. Each profession got a daily transmute what turns raw mats inta processed mats. These then get used fer ta make armor, weapons, flasks, et ceteras. Because the processed mats be soulbound, ya cain't just go ta the auction house and stock up fer ta accelerates, nor can ya hand mats ta a guildie an' say "Makes me an two-handed frammerwhitzle" no mores. We's gonna be locked inta dailies forevers. Fortunatelies, they did done throw us a few bones fer ta speed it up a bit.

Bone numbers one: ya ain't gotta do none of it. professions no longer gives a raid bonus (no fur linin', no extra sockets, no BoP shoulder enchants). No benefits at all. So ya can skip professions alltagethers, if that be yer bag.

Bone number two: Garrisons. Gonna talk more about these later, on account of I ain't talkin' 'bout them now.

Bone number three: these daily transmutes can be learned at skill 1. Is right, a brand spankin' new rookie can make super-dooper epic dookickeys. An' the more skills ya got, the fasters it go. Fer anybody's with skill less than 600, ya gets four processed mats fer every transmute. At 600, this goes up ta five (fer the same number of raw mats). By the time ya gets ta 700, yer pullin' down ten processed mats per cooldown. Also, at that point yer cooldowns get charges, like a monk's rollin'. Ya can blow three dailies all at once, bang-bang-bang. They only recovers one per day, so ya ain't craftin' no faster, but it saves ya the troubles of havin' ta log log in every day. Which be kinda spiffy.

Okay, that's all I's gonna say fer taday. Is more details comin' in Part 2, which will be whenevers I feel like writin' it. Maybe.

Monday, September 15, 2014

Is New PUG Tool In 6.0

Fer puggin' raids an' puggin' group quests an' puggin' all sorta pugs. Buffy the pug is very exciteds by this - ya can tell just by lookin' at her.

Friday, September 12, 2014

In Which Ellspeth Has A Mighty Need


Look at that dragon. Isn't she pretty? Can I take her home with me and ride her?

Yes, yes, Lady Prestor, blah blah, Marshall Windsor, blah blah, thousands dead in Stormwind, blah blah, forty heroes, blah blah, 50 dkp minus, blah blah blah BLAH.

But pretty! And, and, and Deep Breath!

I need!


*clasp hands*

*eyes very wide*

*bite lower lip*




*blink dramatically*

I can haz Pretty?

Thursday, September 11, 2014

Titles What Ain't In WoW But Oughtta Be

"Mother / Father of Dragons"
Dang near anythin' from Song of Ice and Fire would work, reallies. "The Unburnt". "The Mountain What Rides". "Bloody Mummer". "Shits Gold".

"Fruit Vendor"
Awarded fer obstructifyin' leatherworking vendors in Shattrath an' other major cities.

"Evil Twin"
Because who's ta say you ain't?

"Fake Geek Girl"
Can you name the costume changes from Issue #247 ta #248, recite "Ode to a Grecian Urn in the original Klingon, beat the game in super-ultra-crimson-deluxe-challenge mode, an' threaten the manhood of entitled douchewaffles at cons? Then clearlies this be the title fer you.

"Collector of Useless Crap"
Five stacks of jaggal pearls? Check. Cloth fer ta level first aid on three more alts, 'cause ya never know? Check. Ripe Elwynn Pumpkins just in case Blizz removes the vendor what sells them next Pilgrim's Bounty? Got ya covered.

Is a scientific fact what 84% of heroes was members of the Avengers at some point in they's careers, includin' Batman an' Doogie Howser.

"Friend of the Grummles"
They sez I is one - who is Blizz fer ta tell me I ain't? If this were ta become a real title, I could bring meself fer ta forgives Blizz fer the Cataclysm expansion. Mebbe.